When a Friend is Sad

Question:
I have recentley written to you but something came up and i need advice.
On monday i found out that my best friend, parents are seperating. She has allways lived in a “perfect family” lifestyle, and it was such a shock. All i could really do was listen, and my guess is someone cheated on someone, much like in outragiousley alice when pams parents seperate. of course we repeated the whole scenerio, crying and all. it was so depressing. i dont really know what else to do. her parents were like mine and i practically lived with them. How can i help her? she is so sad all the time and i really want to help her! thanks!
 
 
 
Phyllis replied:
 
We always wish we could do or say exactly the right thing to make someone feel better, but there is nothing you can do or say that will solve this family’s problem.  What you can do is listen, again and again and again, even though your friend may go over the same thing, always wondering if it was this or it was that which made her parents decide to separate.  It’s also good to remind yourself that there is no perfect family, just as there aren’t perfect people, and the face they show in public may not be the way it is at home.  No one really knows what goes on inside a marriage except the two people in it, and it’s better not to speculate on what was wrong.  Just listen to your friend, tell her you can only imagine how she feels, but I wouldn’t ask prying questions.  It sounds to me as though you are already trying to be a good friend to her, and I’m glad she has you.

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