I Worry a Lot

I know you get a million emails everyday and this is just another thing cluttering your inbox,but I need help and I cant tell anyone I know,so please help me out.I’m 13 years old and I’m whenever I find something to worry about,I obsess about it.Literally.In 4th grade,I started obsessing about if I was going to Heaven or not and I cried everyday and I went in the bathroom and cried at school everyday and I finally told my brother and he helped me get through it,but it lasted about a year.Something else is happening and Im afraid I am beginning to obsess about it as well.I keep worrying that I am bisexual.I dont get turned on whenever I see a naked girl (my brother looks at pictures of them on the internet and I see him all the time.) I do get turned on alittle when I see girls making out but the thought of ME making out with a girl is disgusting.I would NOT enjoy that at all.I know that even if I did like girls that I wouldnt be a LESBIAN because I like boys VERY much.I know for sure that I like boys and I have never had a crush on a girl I know and Ive never had a crush on a celebrity girl.I’ve slept in the same bed as my friends several times before and I was not turned on.I had a boyfriend and I made out with him and I liked it alot XD.So,I dont know what I expect as a reply to this because I know that you cannot fix this,but it just feels good to be able to type out all my feelings and share them with someone instead of keeping them bottled up inside.I KNOW I like boys alot and even if I did like girls I know I’d like boys more.Please just tell me your thoughts about this and do you think there is any way I can stop worrying?Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.I would appreciate it so much if you could reply to this message because I really need someones help!!I dont want this worry to bother me so much.I love your books and you’re a great inspiration to me!!Have a good day!!
Phyllis replied:
Well, I don’t know of a sure-fire way to make you stop worrying because I’m a worrier too, and if I knew of a way to cure that, I’d cure myself.  But a sense of humor can help.  I remember when I was around 8 or 9, worrying about the Last Judgment, when the trumpet would sound and God would divide “the sheep from the goat,” those who would go to heaven and those who wouldn’t.  I didn’t worry so much about going to hell, because I never thought I deserved that, but I figured that if all the people on earth were going to be judged, and all the people who had already died would be standing in line as well, it was going to be a long time before lunch.  So I carried around two butter cookies in my pocket for several weeks until they became crumbs.  No, I don’t think you’re a lesbian, but it wouldn’t make any difference to me if you were.  We all feel a little quiver when we see something different, something sexual, even though it may not be what in reality would turn us on.  Sometimes I think that because there are so many things to worry about, if someone was a worrier, it’s easier for worriers to pick one thing and then obsess about it, as though it was the only thing in the world to worry about.  If we worry about dying in a plane crash, it keeps us from worrying about even more likely ways to die, for example.  Learn to laugh at yourself a little bit.  You have the right idea to talk about things that bother you.  The things that we try to keep inside us are the things that upset us the most.

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